patterns in...

listening to my mp3 player on "random" is quite interesting. it's like listening to the disjointed selections of a lazy dj who stole my cd collection and is just picking out things at random. it's surprisingly good, so far. appreciating patterns in randomness. also, since i am at work, i can't sing along. i think i end up appreciating the song more than i would otherwise. normally i compulsively sing along to music when i am listening in my car. when that happens, i often fins myself replaying a track on a cd or tape because i was to busy singing along to enjoy the song, only to involuntarily start singing along again half way through thew song. just now as i write this, two songs from the same album came on. what are the chances of that out of hundreds of songs?

my current disposition

today i have a lot of anger and frustration under the surface. this
morning in the car on the way to work i was yelling at my car stereo
and banging it with my hand. then later on at work i was cursing at
the printer. i want to curse at my computer when it malfiunctions. i
am angry in general- but i have a sunny sweet smile on my face!

last night i had a dream i med david beckham in a resturant, he was with his wife (not the spice girl one, a blonde) and his 1 yr old kid, wearing a sailor suit and his hair in a ponytail. he was living in the US but heading back to europe, to the netherlands. i was advising him on where to look for a job, with a popular multinational company like Phillips. during the conversation, my son played with his son, but my son was bigger and maybe playing a little too rough, rolling, falling and laying on him. later in my dream i witnessed the breakup of a bad band in the middle of a song, in the middle of a set, in a beat, mostly-empty bar.