back, in black

today marks the return of my long-absent co-worker, who lost her son back in august. she was out on bereavement and/or unpaid leave. she is wearing all black. i said hello and b.s.'d with her about printing digital photos at Costco and my weekend. i didn't give her a hug or ask her how she is; even though i sort of wanted to, it didn't feel right. it's hard to know what to do in a situation like that, to know what's appropriate. maybe she just wants to be treated like a normal person, and not consoled or pampered.